April1 is now celebrated as RahulDay in India. Due to his busy schedule he couldn’t address people on his day however four days later he mesmerized India Inc at their annual session of CII (Confederation of Indian Industry). For almost one hour he charmed the senses of elite audience gathered in the hall with his awe inspiring anecdotes and his thought exasperating vision about India. Average people with advanced degree in education failed to comprehend his tutorial in managing & empowering billion people and took on to social media to ridicule him. Words words came straight out of his heart, when your heart is so big, why bother exercising brain. Here are some of the key points from his address, summed up for your convenience. His fans affectionately call him Pappu, and his sermon summarized as Pappu-Puran
Rani ki Janshi was not a slip of tongue. People failed to get the intended message. There’s this Leader for a Country concept, and there’s a Country for a leader notion. Lightbulb!!
Statement1: Politics is your shirt, politics is your pants.
Statement2. Politics is poison people should stay away from it.
Message: Eff with Modi’s Five F foumula of Farm to fabric cotton policy — Go Naked.
Original Gandhi wore only a dhoti, Borrowed last name Gandhi asks us to go even a step beyond original Gandhi, “shun your cloths”. (Poonam Panday & Salman Khan are excited)
1) Put people on Pot (and solve problems)
“I want to empower Billion People and that will solve all the problems.”
Let me help you decipher the depth of this gen. “Power is Poison” – Pappu at AICC Jaipur; Pot is Poison – Drug Enforcement. Using grade 5 algebra, power = pot. Give Pot to every individual. People in advanced economy & democracy like US are fighting to legalize marijuana and this visionary is promising crack to all his subjects!! Compare with Modi who is state still has alcohol prohibition & here’s a leader promising weed!! World do not have any problem to being with; its people’s mind that creates problems. If people’s minds are sedated by dope, there won’t be problem.
2) Make people your Boss
Make every person in the country a Boss and that’s how people will feel empowered. Details cannot be spelled out in one hour but rest assured there will be a way to make everyone Boss of someone. How?
Think of a Bee-hive, each hexagon represents each individual. Based on what angle you look at it, every hexagon sits over the other!! (Salman scratching his head now)
Guy on Horse
A guy on the horse won’t come and magically solve your problems. People need to come out of British mentality. Transportation has moved beyond horses & carts. Someone will come in chopper (scraped form the scam) and will save you. No he did not take a dig at Modi here, have you even seen Modi riding a horse or as a matter of fact even a congress person?
Q: And where will the Guy in chopper come from? I
A: If Gandhi is delivering the sermon, the guy obviously will come from Gandhinagar!!
India is an ancient civilization. 2000 years ago we worshiped rivers as a source of energy; we never faced any water problems then. You are bunch of whiners, creating a problem that already had a solution two millennium ago.
Every citizen will be multi-talented. Girish the painter will also be skilled to Girish the carpenter.
Modi said, don’t aspire to be something; aspire to do something. To hell with that; the country is complex. You can’t do anything here. My family couldn’t do anything in 60 years, your PM hasn’t done in 9 years, and so you can’t do anything either. I’ll give you “power” and you solve your own problem.
India Different from foreign nations
He showed an example how other countries hold their people’s hand.
And then he shows how Congress (so far) treats their people (and country). Shows by holding a man by shoulders with his both hands – from behind and only hugging distance away; No dirty KaranJohar “kantaben” thoughts in mind. That was just a metaphor.
Comedian with Compassion
He provided much needed comic relief to the stress stricken country. How often you see a leader who understands the pain of the people and takes quick action. If you think his speech offered you humor, you can return the favor by giving him and his party a break, a well-deserved vacation.
The Padma Bhasan
Padma = flower that blooms in mud. Bhasan = Speech
Not sure what kind of animosity writers have against Gandhi family. Remember that Maut ke Saudagar Speech of Sonia Gandhi during 2007 Gujarat Elections, and now this to her little kid. .
A Padma Bhusan is in waiting for the writer of the next hit speech.
The Standing Ovation
Finally for the people who are wondering why India Inc. gave standing ovation to a speech average people with above intelligence failed to figure head & tail out of it. The standing ovation was not for the speech, it was for the speaker who could be the potential leader. Imagine the situation, you ask question in English, you get response in French and you are free to interpret it in German!! Confused? Let me give you an example.
Businessman: Sir I want to build a factory.
Ans. Boss if you are expecting an answer from me, keep expecting.
Result: Factory is built on a land allocated for a public park.
Not covering “India is a Bee-hive because a lot has been talked about it on social-media including queen Bee and you already are enlightened about it.
This is just the beginning. More chapters will be added as he opens up his heart even more.
Sarah Palin was just a vice-presidential candidate. This guy wants to be your leader. Wake up.